The city life

Ever wonder who the people hustling and bustling in New York city are? You see them rushing back and forth, throngs of people, from every walk of life. I always watched and thought how cool it is to have a life so determined, focused, and on point. Of course, not everyone in the City has that mindset but their hurried footsteps, phone conversations all sound of great importance. Everyone all dressed up, heels, suites; it’s a perfect scene.

Turns out there is a lot going on under ground. No, literally, there are the subways, a million flights down. But it is more than that, I know because I have become one. Every day it is a rush to get to the right stop, hope to find a seat and by hope I mean you have to be really quick or else you will be standing for 45 minutes. It is a constant struggle to give up your seat for someone older because who are you to sit while they tower over you with their cane and all. On the other hand, it is really heavy to carry those fancy purses. So I hustle and bustle like the rest of the pack of people I have been squashed onto a bus with. All that body odor and skin touching takes time to get used to. There are many who’s eyes shut instantly, mine are scanning for the odd ones, making sure I am safe. Some days it takes me an hour some days 40 minutes, I am doing my best but at the mercy of transportation, so are all of us here in the City. You may have thought the life under the famous tourist streets were smooth and peaceful because the streets were very much the opposite, you are mistaken though, the life is a ground of red, blue, green lines mixed all together yet somehow there is a flow.

It just shows how much more there is than meets the eye. The heels, the suites, there is more to it, a lot more.

Your Editor

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Hello again :)

Boy has a lot happened, hence the obvious lack of posting. There have been a few deaths in the family which have been very emotionally draining and difficult. Living away has made traveling a constant event that sometimes is not too much fun. At the end of the day we all do what needs to be done. Family is there through thick and thin and losing people causes you to realize what and who your family is all about. Yes, we all have our differences but family is family and mine is special. It might even be the disagreements that make us, us, it doesn’t matter- life is only so long, and cherishing the time we have together while we still can is important.

On a bit of a happier note- I took the CPA exam! I know right?! It has been forever (maybe more than 6 months!) but at last I sat on the booth, put those headphones on to block out the noise and did it- with 30 minutes to spare no less!! I hope I passed. I will be in the process of taking the next one and I am pretty sure it won’t take as long as the first one! I haven’t gotten the scores back yet but I am anxiously awaiting. Let me just tell you that the week leading up to the exam made me 10 lbs heavier. I never stress ate so much in my life. My husband laughed at me because I put these really small chocolate chips on a napkin next to me and every time I got a question right (which wasn’t so frequent) I would treat myself to ONE chocolate chip. It was pure torture. But boy, the second I walked out of the test did I feel my shoulders unload a really heavy load. I felt like I can breath again. Also, the exam is more nerves than anything else. It is not knowing what questions you will get, how easy the process to check into the exam is, and a whole bunch of other things. Doing it once really put the process into perspective, because no matter how much you read about it there is nothing like going through it yourself. Boy am I happy that the test is behind me!

Marriage is awesome. It is work but it is good work. It makes you do a lot of introspection and learn how to properly communicate. It is a healthy process, or at least it is for me. It feels as though I am not married, it feels as though it is to good to be true. I look at my husband sometimes and I just am amazed that wow he is actually my husband! It is a funny feeling. It makes me warm inside because he loves me so much, takes such good care of me, and makes me so supper happy. Plus he is handsome so it works 🙂 it is pleasant waking up to a pretty face.

I am getting on a plane now so that is all I can type out for now. I hope to get back onto my daily posting schedule. Thank you!

Your Editor

Being you

who said you need to be perfect?

I have met wayy too many new people in the span of much too short of a time. I can vaguely recall maybe a quarter of the people’s names. One thing I have stuck to is being myself. I find that when placed in many new scenes one can lose themselves trying to hold on to what is around them. It is a scary thought because one can get consumed in it and by the time they look up they are surrounded by unfamiliarity, with no clue how they got there.

I met the people, said hi, smiled, waved, pretended to show interest in details I could not remember two seconds after being said, most of all I stayed true to myself. So when they all stopped dancing and I wanted to dance, I danced despite every eye on me. And when the wannabe girlfriend flanked around my Husband, I felt pity for her but did not detour from standing confidently beside him. And when I wanted to jump in the pool and only the kids were in it- we jumped in together and all the adults secretly wished they had the balls to do it. I am me. I may have looked like a fool to you. I may have worn the wrong outfit in your opinion- but it’s just that- your opinion.

I know it’s not over, being in a new place requires the constant smiles and overly enthusiastic responses, however, I will be true to myself- and trust me- it’s doing you a favor. Say what you want behind my back, I am me and I am proud of me, good or bad, I will try my best to be pleasant, sweet, and nothing but wonderful, you on the other hand, may just not be my cup of tea- but it’s great meeting you 🙂

I sound mean but I mean it from the goodness inside me: I dislike the show everyone puts on for everyone else, I dislike the constant need to sound amazing and always happy, life is serious you know? We don’t all live in mansions covered in heaps of cash with not a worry in the world. It is like driving down a road filled with beautiful houses; you met me once, stopped, said a few words, commented on my looks, and went on to the next. There is more to me than that. Maybe if you actually heard what I had to say instead of nodding until I am done so you can say what you wanted to say next- then maybe I would think you would actually care to meet me. Instead all these people walk by me, stop, say their two cents, leave, catch up with the person a few steps ahead who just did the same thing and discuss what ‘type’ they think I am. I have only heard good things circle back my way about myself but it also just confirms that the cycle of people walking into my life actually is factual. Now if only one would stop, look me in the eyes and care for a genuine response, not just wait to hear the perfectly fabricated response you want me saying.

So if I say something unusual, maybe it is because I am an actual person not just a house standing on a pedestal waiting to be awed at.

Your Editor

 

If you are going to be anything in life, be nice

it can’t hurt

It is a simple thing to be. There is nothing more to it: just be nice.

I met a very nice lady today, she gave her time to me, genuinely cared about how I looked, and took the time to make me feel good. Not everyone can be nice, but if you have the chance, nice for even a moment, is better than nothing.

My Husband laughs at me because I say “hello” and “good morning” to just about everyone I see. I can tell you that about 85-90% of the people do not respond. Why? I was just being nice and saying hello or wishing you a good day. I don’t get it. Actually, I take that back- I get it to an extent. If I was some creepy person saying hi then I do not blame you for avoiding all eye contact. However, last I checked the mirror, I looked as un-creepy as they get. Yes, everyone has their perception of what creepy is, but some people you can just tell are not out to kidnap you or steal your wallet. Anyways- back to being nice…

It is nice to be nice- if you know what I mean. You get pleasure from being nice to someone else. It is fulfilling in its own sense of the word.

There is  famous saying of “if you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say it,” I am not the greatest at following to it, but there are certainly some very fine people out there who have nothing bad to say about anyone and anything. I am human tho, and plenty of times I will complain about something/someone, or say a not so nice comment. But what I try to do is whenever a nice comment pops in my head I say it. I don’t care if I never met you, if I think your dress is pretty I will openly tell you “nice dress!” Your choice on how to respond- but I will not keep a complement inside. So, I will still have times where I won’t say the nicest thing ever but I have plenty more nice things that come out of my mouth that I say with pride. You never know when a nice compliment can save someone’s day, life, or even make a slight improvement, or even make them laugh because they think you are crazy!

I remember vividly sitting in class one day during a rough patch in my life and just waiting to see how long it would take for someone to just smile my way, say hello, wave, anything. I remember thinking to myself that if only people would look outside themselves for a moment they would realize that there is a world filled with people, and some of those people they can actually make a difference to. It was a lonely time in my life and I think that is why I try so very hard to look for the sad people in the crowd, sometimes it is hard to find them but when you make eye contact, you can see it all. No one should feel like that. No one should wait for someone to smile at them, notice them, we are all humans and deserved to be treated with respect and the simple and easiest way that can be done is by looking at someone and saying “hello”.

Your Editor

 

The Cafe Lady

who would have thought

Well what do you know, people sitting next to you really do get a kick out of your telephone conversations! Before I tell you the story I want to tell you another story. I was on the bus the other day and the girl sitting next to me, must have been around 16-19 years old, was writing out a text message of some form. Curious as I was and with nowhere else to look, I casually looked down and a little to the side and had a great view of everything she was typing. “I am supposed to sit at home and wait for my father to pass out then call the police,”… “The deposition just is a bunch of lawyers saying things I can never understand,” my heart broke. Who knows where this girl was headed to, what she had to deal with but just sitting beside her made me want to reach out and comfort her. As young as she was, dealing with who knows what, makes you realize sitting beside people from all ends of the earth is… there is just no words for it.

Today, I had a couple of words of my own, and so did she. We were sitting at a lovely cafe, kids playing, beautiful atmosphere, one of those places that just make you happy. There was a skinny, short curly-haired lady sitting directly across from us. From when we got there till she left we did not have any interaction except one. She mumbled something to herself, picked up the phone, and boy, what a mouth she had! Every other word was a curse word. “I’m Hungry and I can’t F****** leave here because then I will be expected to clean and cook for a F****** grown adult. I can’t handle this it’s breaking my F****** balls. I just want to go home and sit with my S**** and my own food and not have to listen to this F****** shrieking anymore.” It went on for a bit longer than that. My Husband and I took one look at each other, raised our eyebrows, and were very happy when she hung up, though it was quite amusing. She was overheating, most likely because she was hangry, but boy did she want to go home. Five minutes after her cursing fiasco, she gives me a smile and in the nicest voice ever, as if we did not hear her whole list of profanities, asks me to unplug her computer charger. This brought to mind the idea of how a person can treat a total stranger with the utmost respect and a person they actually know with complete and utter disgust.

It is like we have this idea in our mind that we need to be nice to those we do not know and being mean to those we do, is normal. Well, it should not be. Why should we care about what a total stranger thinks of us? They most likely will never see us again. It is a scary thought because you can be so angry at someone you know and the minute you bump into someone not as known a mask falls over your face and you are this brand new human that hasn’t a care in the world. This lady was angry. She was pissed. She was hungry, why couldn’t she express any of that in her tone when she turned to me? Just because one doesn’t know someone doesn’t mean that one cannot express an emotion that is strong. It is like we are all expected to be perfect and because of that everyone has a fear of what people will say and think, so they are quick to hide any sign of imperfection. If only we could have that feeling with the people we are most comfortable with, the world would be a whole lot better of a place. 

Plenty people are divorcing, separating, breaking-up, losing friends and family relationships all because they are too comfortable and forget that those closest to them still deserve respect. It is challenging because when you spend day in and day out with people you grow accustomed to being around them and forget that they still deserve a thank you and just because you are upset about your day doesn’t mean they deserve the lashing for it. It takes a person to constantly work on themselves to continue to make sure their relationships stay new and fresh. If you think back to the first time you met the person you are in a relationship with, most of the time it was a positive scenario and stayed positive until one person in the relationship got too comfortable and stopped thinking about the other person and instead only about themselves. It happens to everyone but being aware of it, makes you one less person part of the ‘people pleasing population.’

Your Editor

Being a MRS.

a happy wife is a happy life

There is more to life than a ring, flowers, a big white dress, and one day. Life continues after. Life gets real after. Life becomes life. I know I say this a lot but it is important so I will say it here again: life is what you make it. Life would be easier if you could blame someone else or hold them responsible for your happiness. However, that is not how it works as I am sure many of you bloggers know.

Being married puts this concept into practice. Your spouse is NOT responsible for your happiness. Obviously, doing things to enhance your spirits is always nice but not dependable to your happiness. I say this because married or not, you go through things in life and you are in charge of how you decide to react. Your partner does not become responsible for your perspective. Yes, being married entails realizing your partner’s emotions, cheering them, being there for them, giving, etc, but one thing that continues to remain your responsibility is your reaction.

Marriage comes with a whole list of things to take care of: cleaning, cooking, laundry, I am sure I don’t need to verbalize more. Now all these things can become something hard to do, something bothersome, something painful, or you can put a smile, say you are lucky to have someone in your life to come home to, and get the job done. That, I would say, is step 1: starting your new role positively. Step 2 would be when your spouse does something, how do you react to it? It is not easy. It is easy to become ungrateful, unhappy, and unsatisfied, but doing the opposite will be much more fulfilling.

This may just be a post filled with thoughts not fully completed, but the bits and pieces are worth holding on to. We all know these ideas, concepts, whatever you want to call them, but like I always say, you have to do something with this information or else it will just sit in the front of your mind for a span of 30 seconds until something else more captivating takes over that spot and these thoughts will most likely be forever forgotten. That being said, have a saying hanging on your fridge that reminds you to stay and be positive, to be thankful, grateful, and most of all to smile. My Husband says one line that I will never forget: the hottest curve on your body is your smile. Being happy yourself will most definitely have an effect on your spouse, and if all is normal in your corner of the world, then that effect will be more positive than not.

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I hope my bits of randomness made you think of one more reason to look at life through a smiley pair of shades 🙂

Your Editor

Back from seventh heaven

Hey ya’ll!

Boy does time fly. The wedding came and went so fast. I keep looking at pictures trying to make it sink in, that this actually happened, I am actually a MRS! It is a crazy feeling. Also pretty crazy that it has not hit me! It was beautiful. A night filled with smiles, love, family, friends, and a handsome man to go home with. Mind you all, our ride home was ONE OF A KIND! Not the typical limo. My Husband (AHH!) arranged to get the car of my dream, 1960 Bentley! I was shocked! He completely surprised me, and that was the best part. He knew what I wanted and I did not even realize it!! It made the whole night! We danced our hearts out and left holding each other as one.

Everyone has high expectations of the first night. We came back and I was bent over trying not to throw up, it was comforting knowing my Husband (it won’t ever get old saying it ;)) put me first and made sure I got what I needed to feel better.

Marriage is what you make it. Everyone can tell you what it will and won’t be but at the end of the day your attitude is what will get you the furthest. Things get challenging but a smile and a bit of compromising never killed anyone and actually can get you further than you think. With that in mind, today is a brand new day filled with endless giving, devotion, love, and putting each other first. Take a minute and tell your partner you love them. Reflect on why you chose them to be in your life and you will suddenly be filled with a whole lot of love 🙂

Till next time 😘

Your Editor