The Jew and the German

who you trust

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The world has gone through many stages in its existence. There have been troubling times and their have been happy times. The era of Nazi Germany has left marks on people till this day. For some it is the mark on their hand, for others a mark on their soul of all the family they have lost. Ever since then, the Jew and the German have walked on two separate paths. Rarely do you see an interaction, and when there is one, it is always very hesitant. There is a matter of trust strangers have with each other but for a Jew and a German there is no trust.

It would be very odd then to see two Jews helping two Germans. One could say the Jews were not aware of the others identity, however, that would end when the question of “where are you from?” came up. And it did. Although the Jew tried extra hard to cover up the emotion of distrust that ran across her face, it was felt. It is hard for one to not feel the hesitation between two sects of people. Would you blame the Jew?

They helped the Germans. They took the time to make sure they were going in the right direction and had all the information they needed, but why? Why would someone whose ancestors were brutally victimized even stop for a moment to help the people whose parents could have very well been the same people who tortured and killed six million people?

A Jew is someone who knows that everything is in the hands of God. That means the reward and punishment of man falls on God to decide. Were the Jews able to put aside their instinct of distrust and hate to help the Germans? They did it with a smile. They laughed, tried to make conversation, and even complimented the German. What would you call that if not trust? One would say that the Jews didn’t honor their identity and trusted the Germans but that would be false because a Jew in its blood knows that there is only trust in God. So the Jews were able to talk and laugh because they knew they were doing the right thing by helping two lost people, where those people came from was entirely in the hands of God.

Your Editor

Hello again :)

Boy has a lot happened, hence the obvious lack of posting. There have been a few deaths in the family which have been very emotionally draining and difficult. Living away has made traveling a constant event that sometimes is not too much fun. At the end of the day we all do what needs to be done. Family is there through thick and thin and losing people causes you to realize what and who your family is all about. Yes, we all have our differences but family is family and mine is special. It might even be the disagreements that make us, us, it doesn’t matter- life is only so long, and cherishing the time we have together while we still can is important.

On a bit of a happier note- I took the CPA exam! I know right?! It has been forever (maybe more than 6 months!) but at last I sat on the booth, put those headphones on to block out the noise and did it- with 30 minutes to spare no less!! I hope I passed. I will be in the process of taking the next one and I am pretty sure it won’t take as long as the first one! I haven’t gotten the scores back yet but I am anxiously awaiting. Let me just tell you that the week leading up to the exam made me 10 lbs heavier. I never stress ate so much in my life. My husband laughed at me because I put these really small chocolate chips on a napkin next to me and every time I got a question right (which wasn’t so frequent) I would treat myself to ONE chocolate chip. It was pure torture. But boy, the second I walked out of the test did I feel my shoulders unload a really heavy load. I felt like I can breath again. Also, the exam is more nerves than anything else. It is not knowing what questions you will get, how easy the process to check into the exam is, and a whole bunch of other things. Doing it once really put the process into perspective, because no matter how much you read about it there is nothing like going through it yourself. Boy am I happy that the test is behind me!

Marriage is awesome. It is work but it is good work. It makes you do a lot of introspection and learn how to properly communicate. It is a healthy process, or at least it is for me. It feels as though I am not married, it feels as though it is to good to be true. I look at my husband sometimes and I just am amazed that wow he is actually my husband! It is a funny feeling. It makes me warm inside because he loves me so much, takes such good care of me, and makes me so supper happy. Plus he is handsome so it works ๐Ÿ™‚ it is pleasant waking up to a pretty face.

I am getting on a plane now so that is all I can type out for now. I hope to get back onto my daily posting schedule. Thank you!

Your Editor

The Cafe Lady

who would have thought

Well what do you know, people sitting next to you really do get a kick out of your telephone conversations! Before I tell you the story I want to tell you another story. I was on the bus the other day and the girl sitting next to me, must have been around 16-19 years old, was writing out a text message of some form. Curious as I was and with nowhere else to look, I casually looked down and a little to the side and had a great view of everything she was typing. “I am supposed to sit at home and wait for my father to pass out then call the police,”… “The deposition just is a bunch of lawyers saying things I can never understand,” my heart broke. Who knows where this girl was headed to, what she had to deal with but just sitting beside her made me want to reach out and comfort her. As young as she was, dealing with who knows what, makes you realize sitting beside people from all ends of the earth is… there is just no words for it.

Today, I had a couple of words of my own, and so did she. We were sitting at a lovely cafe, kids playing, beautiful atmosphere, one of those places that just make you happy. There was a skinny, short curly-haired lady sitting directly across from us. From when we got there till she left we did not have any interaction except one. She mumbled something to herself, picked up the phone, and boy, what a mouth she had! Every other word was a curse word. “I’m Hungry and I can’t F****** leave here because then I will be expected to clean and cook for a F****** grown adult. I can’t handle this it’s breaking my F****** balls. I just want to go home and sit with my S**** and my own food and not have to listen to this F****** shrieking anymore.” It went on for a bit longer than that. My Husband and I took one look at each other, raised our eyebrows, and were very happy when she hung up, though it was quite amusing. She was overheating, most likely because she was hangry, but boy did she want to go home. Five minutes after her cursing fiasco, she gives me a smile and in the nicest voice ever, as if we did not hear her whole list of profanities, asks me to unplug her computer charger. This brought to mind the idea of how a person can treat a total stranger with the utmost respect and a person they actually know with complete and utter disgust.

It is like we have this idea in our mind that we need to be nice to those we do not know and being mean to those we do, is normal. Well, it should not be. Why should we care about what a total stranger thinks of us? They most likely will never see us again. It is a scary thought because you can be so angry at someone you know and the minute you bump into someone not as known a mask falls over your face and you are this brand new human that hasn’t a care in the world. This lady was angry. She was pissed. She was hungry, why couldn’t she express any of that in her tone when she turned to me? Just because one doesn’t know someone doesn’t mean that one cannot express an emotion that is strong. It is like we are all expected to be perfect and because of that everyone has a fear of what people will say and think, so they are quick to hide any sign of imperfection. If only we could have that feeling with the people we are most comfortable with, the world would be a whole lot better of a place.ย 

Plenty people are divorcing, separating, breaking-up, losing friends and family relationships all because they are too comfortable and forget that those closest to them still deserve respect. It is challenging because when you spend day in and day out with people you grow accustomed to being around them and forget that they still deserve a thank you and just because you are upset about your day doesn’t mean they deserve the lashing for it. It takes a person to constantly work on themselves to continue to make sure their relationships stay new and fresh. If you think back to the first time you met the person you are in a relationship with, most of the time it was a positive scenario and stayed positive until one person in the relationship got too comfortable and stopped thinking about the other person and instead only about themselves. It happens to everyone but being aware of it, makes you one less person part of the ‘people pleasing population.’

Your Editor

My non-existent garden

as of now ๐Ÿ™‚

Photo byย Janelle Hewinesย onย Unsplash

As I prepared for marriage one thing that came on my list over and over was I wanted to garden. I want a place for me to grow herbs, fruits, vegetables, and I want to be able to eat them. I want one day our kids to enjoy them, to have fun cutting the weeds out, picking a tomato and watching them eat it knowing that it came from home. It brings me a sense of peace. I do not know where to start, how to start, especially living in a place that is more cold than hot, and also because I haven’t a clue to anything about gardening…. I will get there tho.

For now, I dream of what I will start with, what will grow first, and the what recipes I will use with the things I have spent time bringing to life.

Turns out our new neighbors garden. It is quite ironic because the husband gardens and the wife could care less about it. Though, the more we get to know them the more we are realizing that the ‘normal’ role of husband and wife is reverse when it comes to them- but hey, whatever gets the job done, no? ๐Ÿ™‚

Back to gardening … there are endless possibilities of where to start and I am sure as soon as these dreadful exams are done I can pick up and attempt to begin something that I imagine to be beautiful, filled with live, fresh, and emotionally rewarding.

Your Editor

Being a MRS.

a happy wife is a happy life

There is more to life than a ring, flowers, a big white dress, and one day. Life continues after. Life gets real after. Life becomes life. I know I say this a lot but it is important so I will say it here again: life is what you make it. Life would be easier if you could blame someone else or hold them responsible for your happiness. However, that is not how it works as I am sure many of you bloggers know.

Being married puts this concept into practice. Your spouse isย NOT responsible for your happiness. Obviously, doing things to enhance your spirits is always nice but not dependable to your happiness. I say this because married or not, you go through things in life and you are in charge of how you decide to react. Your partner does not become responsible for your perspective. Yes, being married entails realizing your partner’s emotions, cheering them, being there for them, giving, etc, but one thing that continues to remain your responsibility is your reaction.

Marriage comes with a whole list of things to take care of: cleaning, cooking, laundry, I am sure I don’t need to verbalize more. Now all these things can become something hard to do, something bothersome, something painful, or you can put a smile, say you are lucky to have someone in your life to come home to, and get the job done. That, I would say, is step 1: starting your new role positively. Step 2 would be when your spouse does something, how do you react to it? It is not easy. It is easy to become ungrateful, unhappy, and unsatisfied, but doing the opposite will be much more fulfilling.

This may just be a post filled with thoughts not fully completed, but the bits and pieces are worth holding on to. We all know these ideas, concepts, whatever you want to call them, but like I always say, you have toย do something with this information or else it will just sit in the front of your mind for a span of 30 seconds until something else more captivating takes over that spot and these thoughts will most likely be forever forgotten. That being said, have a saying hanging on your fridge that reminds you to stay and be positive, to be thankful, grateful, and most of all to smile. My Husband says one line that I will never forget: the hottest curve on your body is your smile. Being happy yourself will most definitely have an effect on your spouse, and if all is normal in your corner of the world, then that effect will be more positive than not.

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I hope my bits of randomness made you think of one more reason to look at life through a smiley pair of shades ๐Ÿ™‚

Your Editor

Back from seventh heaven

Hey ya’ll!

Boy does time fly. The wedding came and went so fast. I keep looking at pictures trying to make it sink in, that this actually happened, I am actually a MRS! It is a crazy feeling. Also pretty crazy that it has not hit me! It was beautiful. A night filled with smiles, love, family, friends, and a handsome man to go home with. Mind you all, our ride home was ONE OF A KIND! Not the typical limo. My Husband (AHH!) arranged to get the car of my dream, 1960 Bentley! I was shocked! He completely surprised me, and that was the best part. He knew what I wanted and I did not even realize it!! It made the whole night! We danced our hearts out and left holding each other as one.

Everyone has high expectations of the first night. We came back and I was bent over trying not to throw up, it was comforting knowing my Husband (it won’t ever get old saying it ;)) put me first and made sure I got what I needed to feel better.

Marriage is what you make it. Everyone can tell you what it will and won’t be but at the end of the day your attitude is what will get you the furthest. Things get challenging but a smile and a bit of compromising never killed anyone and actually can get you further than you think. With that in mind, today is a brand new day filled with endless giving, devotion, love, and putting each other first. Take a minute and tell your partner you love them. Reflect on why you chose them to be in your life and you will suddenly be filled with a whole lot of love ๐Ÿ™‚

Till next time ๐Ÿ˜˜

Your Editor

The balance between mother and person

What category are you part of?

There is a fine line between a mother and a person. I wonder what it will be like for me. I see mothers all around me and it is easy to tell the angry mother from the selfish mother and the loving warm mother from the cold mother.

A mother is in the position to be every type of person out there. There is a time and place for every emotion, what you decide to use in that situation is what mother you become. I met a family of 10 kids that each one can honestly say they have never heard their mother raise her voice. Shocking, I know. On the other hand I know mothers that scream, that is their way of talking. I know mothers that have absolutely nothing nice to say to their kids. There are mothers who only think about themselves and if they want something they get it because they have the position of a mother.

I am not entering motherhood yet but entering marriage makes your mind automatically think about the next stage in your life. I would like to think that I can figure out how to be a well balanced mother; firm when my children need it, always loving and supportive, caring, strong, patient, happy. The list goes on. I want to be able to come home from a rough day at work and file work away in a cabinet and put a smile on my face. If my kid wants to know why after everything I say, be able to respond without getting annoyed. I know a mother who made a hole in her wall because she punched it so hard as a result of her daughter asking why too many times. I want to show my children how to have the proper respect, fear , and love for us. I do not want to create a home where my children are built out of fear. On the other side, I want them to have the level of fear they need to have in order to properly respect. It is all so complex. I think of it as a sound system that has over a hundred different lines that can be leveled up or down yet somehow they are all supposed to evenly match up but when you try matching them up there are always a few that go too high or too low.

We still need to be humans. Until about a few years ago I never thought of my mother as a person, she was my mother. Only when you reach a certain age do you realize your mother has emotions, needs, desires too. It is hard to have kids that do not realize it. The key is to raise them in a way that they know it. I have not figured out how to do that, yet.

We will need to figure out how to balance us and the children (us being husband and wife). It is no longer just us in the marriage. However, one cannot act as though there is no us. First came you, then your spouse, then your kids. You must care for yourself. Once you are at peace, your husband, and last your kids. Balance is the key word here; one cannot be overly obsessed with taking care of just themselves or just their spouse, the sound levels need to match up with the amount you put into each line.

I hope thinking about this now can help me in the future be a well balanced mother to our children.

Your Editor